A Family’s Guide to Supporting Recovery During the Holidays
By: The Second Chances Team
The holidays are a time when many families come together to celebrate, but for someone in addiction recovery, this season can also bring added stress, uncomfortable situations, and reminders of the past. As a family member or spouse, you may want to help but aren’t always sure what to say or do. Should you avoid serving alcohol? What if your loved one doesn’t want to attend a family gathering? How do you offer support without making them feel uncomfortable?
While every person’s recovery is different, there are ways to create a supportive environment that allows your loved one to enjoy the holidays while continuing to prioritize their sobriety.
1. Be Mindful of Alcohol at Holiday Gatherings
Alcohol is often part of holiday celebrations, but its presence can make gatherings uncomfortable or triggering for someone in recovery. If you’re hosting, consider making the event alcohol-free, especially if your loved one is in early recovery.
Remember, you don’t have to make a big announcement about someone’s sobriety. Simply creating an environment where alcohol isn’t the focus can help them feel more comfortable.
2. Respect Their Boundaries
Your loved one may not feel ready to attend every holiday party or family gathering, and that’s okay. They may need to leave an event early, avoid certain people, or spend part of the holidays with their recovery support system. Try not to take these decisions personally. What may seem like a simple family tradition to you could be a difficult situation for someone working to maintain their sobriety.
3. Avoid Bringing Up the Past
The holidays are not the time to revisit every mistake or difficult experience connected to your loved one’s addiction. Recovery often involves rebuilding trust and repairing relationships, but these conversations should happen at appropriate times, not unexpectedly in front of family members.
If there are unresolved issues, it’s okay to acknowledge that they still need attention. Just choose a private setting and a time when both of you are prepared to talk.
4. Offer Support Without Enabling
Supporting someone in recovery does not mean removing every consequence of their actions or providing financial assistance that could contribute to active substance use. Healthy support may look like offering a ride to a recovery meeting, preparing a meal, encouraging them to stay connected with their counselor, or listening when they need someone to talk to.
5. Understand That the Holidays Can Bring Up Difficult Emotions
Not everyone looks forward to the holiday season. For someone in recovery, family gatherings may bring up guilt, grief, and loneliness. If your loved one seems withdrawn or emotional, try not to assume they are being ungrateful or uninterested in spending time with family. Sometimes, listening without trying to fix the situation is the most helpful thing you can do.
6. Encourage Their Recovery Routine
Between holiday travel, family gatherings, and busy schedules, it’s easy for normal routines to get disrupted. Encourage your loved one to continue attending meetings, keeping counseling appointments, and making time for the habits that support their sobriety. If they need to step away from a gathering to attend a meeting or speak with their sponsor, respect that commitment.
If you or a loved one needs help, contact our 24/7 information and intake line at 833.780.3088. Second chances are only a call away.
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